i see the public vote is now open for this year's aa2a intake. the competitive part of me wants me to be the favourite, to get the necognitian and prestigue of the extra coverage.
and in the moment of competitiveness ness, my shoulders drop, my inner voice starts to question the information on my profile page. have i actually stated what my project is, have i listed my three thngs that i am interested in and have i enough personal information to be able to form bonds with person or persons unknown who i really want them to vote for me...
and then i stop, oversee teeth cleaning and night time settling and all is calm.
i return to my writing. i return to my intention of letting my profile evolve over the course of the residency as i can, and given the last two years of hard pressing work ( imagine the nose pressing hard into something hard ) having some time to play and explore and research in real time is just so creatively liberating.
of my three aims coming into this residency, one has altered, one is in search of context and the thrid is doing very nicely thank you. there are some initial outcomes coming on line in the next few days.
so upon reflection again, as much as i want me and my endeavours to be voted for, the actual notion of a vote is unsettling. the thing i most desire is the one thing that will stop me achieving what i desire, so the desire to make work from within will remain to be the desire.
i remember my fvourite brian duffy quote:
" the work is the statement, all the rest is just -------- ."